My mom is a writer but its sort of a secret. She says I am not a writer I write. My mom worries about how she says things. I edit her work. She says I’m the best except for dad. I don’t mind it. Sometimes her sentences make no sense and I tell her so. She doesn’t always use my changes. I tell her don’t blame me when no one gets it. My parents think my school has limits so they make me take outside activites and hang out with kids from other places. That’s not bad but my favorite thing is sports and math. My dad always tells my mom never to do math in public. They they laugh and my mom says she doesn’t know where I came from and then they both say grandpa Robert. And then my mom gets sad. Sometimes my mom gets jealous of me and my dad. I love my mom and I don’t want her to feel jealous. She says it’s not my responsibility. I gotta go now, grandma Marina is picking me up today so we can make blueberry blinchiki! But first I have PE, Science, history and drama and then soccer practice. I’m hungry now!

My biggest weakness. This is a tough assignment. I am always late and I think that is my biggest weakness even though I’m also terrible at ballet. My parents are the reason I am late to school. When I wake them up they ask for ten more minutes. EVERY DAY! My friend Terese’s dad is a lawyer and he wakes her up for school. Terese’s mom works for the library at school. Terese has a little sister named Alice. Her dad says my dad’s work is interesting in a way where it sounds like he doesn’t think it’s interesting. Terese says her dad says that he can’t believe what my dad’s paintings sell for and that maybe he should have stuck with crayons instead of paying for an education. Now whenever I see him I only say hi and that’s it. I told my dad about it and he told me that everyone needs to believe about each other what they need to believe about each other. It didn’t make me feel any better. He said I should just remember it because it would make me feel better in a couple of years. 

My parents always say stuff like that and they make me late. 

Hi. Last night I couldn’t sleep. First it was thunder and lightening and Emily wouldn’t come out of the closet. I noticed her nose under my dress. For a minute I got scared. Then I lost Emerson. But I found him. He had crawled behind my dresser again. He ate off the back of one of the legs. He has a super jaw for his size. Mom says he seems genetically engineered like seadless watermelon (yum!) Anyway my memory of being a baby is that when i was a baby my mom and dad dressed me like animals. Everday almost. I had animal outfits for every animal with footsies and EARS! My least favorite is the giraffe. It was a turtleneck and it went too high. When I get mad at my parents about that or anything they try not to laugh. But I can tell that they are laughing. The reason I know this is that it happens to me in school. 

Everybody thinks my name is Ellen but its Elen. My dad tells my mom he told her so but my mom tells my dad just let it go. I like this school project about families. My parents are fun and really nice but sometimes they drive me crazy! I’m ten and I live in New York City and I have a dog named after my grandpa Robert. I have a gerbil called Emerson and another dog named Emily. I wish I had a sister like my best friend Terese but I just don’t and I don’t think it’s going to happen. My parents are too busy being artists. It’s embarrassing.

For example, my dad smokes outside of school by the front door. The principal complained. Dad’s hair looks greasy and sometimes he wears flannels.

For example, he also likes to dress like me. He buys us matching shirts! He buys me boy clothes! He bought me riding pants. Sometimes I think there’s something wrong with him.

For example, when I wear stripes he asks if he can to. I never say yes. He needs to wash his hair and look like grandpa. I have a lot of pictures of grandpa in my room. He was a doctor. His hair was always clean and he wore suits. His hair was white. My dad says I’m too conventional. He says to look it up it means I want to be the same. If that’s what it means then I think that he’s conventional. He and his friends all dress alike and talk about the same stuff all the time. It’s so boring! Anyway, more tomorrow and I like this English class. Next I have PE!!!!!!! (yes!)